Hands Spread a Begger I stand
By (Mawlana) Junayd Makda
Standing before You helpless and weak
Hands spread within my sorrows I cry
I have no place to go but to You
A lost and lonely soul searching You
Exhausted from all my worldly endeavours,
Seeming to find not what I search
Feeling ever distant from my heart’s yearn
Losing myself within all my own desires
Finding all my efforts to be of lost cause
Such time far from (You) expect what else can I
Alas, realise have I finally to stop and turn
For all else can give me not what I seek
There is deep and dark emptiness within me
A thirst which quench I can not alone
A surrender of hope and lack of strength
I stand at Your door finally O Rab
I beg You to glance at my sorry state
Watch the tears of a begger upon cheeks
Hands emptied and weakened by life’s journey
But holding tight to Your rope of hope
Fill me O Allah, fulfil all of what I ask
Return not these hands empty, despondent
Travelled have they long with endless failures
But arrived finally at your door my Rab
Shower Your mercies and wash away my wrongs
Envelope me in Your forgiveness so vast
Leave me not within such a sorry state
Forgive me O Allah, forgive me
When a person reflects over all the times he/she has been hurt, let down, left disappointed or heartbroken, it’s not hard to see that no matter how hard a person tries behind something or someone, there is always the possibility of being hurt at the end of it.
Sometimes it is because of a lack of sincerity, while at other times simply down to everyone’s own circumstances or preferences. Love, friendship and commitment are seldomly truly appreciated and rarely something people give sacrifice for and so the heartache.
So what then? What can a person do?
In this poem, we beautifully remind ourselves of life’s journey full of hurt and pain and reminds us no matter how far we drift the only One Who will never hurt or let us down is indeed Allah Ta’ala. So why not try behind Him?
An Amazing Incident:
A man once came to Shaykh Shibli رحمه الله saying, “O Shaykh! I no longer want to live, I’d rather die!”
He was visibly hurt and had lost hope.
The Shaykh said, “ Do not worry my son, tell me what is the matter so I can help you.”
The man opened up to the Shaykh and told him of a very close friend, with whom he would do everything with, but then one day all of a sudden he left him.
Now he couldn’t sleep, eat, or do anything and life no longer seemed worth living anymore.
The Shaykh listened quietly and said, “My son, do not worry, there is a simple solution to this problem of yours. Why do you not find another friend? ”
“No! Never SHAYKH! I vow never to share my love or such strong friendship with anyone ever again!” replied the man.
The Shaykh said, “Of course you won’t, but what I mean is be wise this time, and choose a friend that will never leave you and hurt you this way.”
“But Shaykh I never thought my first friend would leave me, how can I be so sure the second one won’t.”
“My dear son, I will find such a friend for you, that even if you forget Him, He will never leave you!”
“Who is this friend Shaykh?” asked the young man.
The Shaykh read a verse from the Quran, “Allahu waliyul ladhina aamanoo” and then said,” My dear son, Allah is the friend of the Believers, befriend Allah and see the pleasure your heart will experience…!”
Everyone we are close to will one day leave us but Allah Ta’ala will never leave us.
So let us also be wise. Indeed love and give love to all those around us, but don’t forget there is someone more deserving of our love and someone who will not hurt us and that Is Allah Ta’ala.